Darling Terence: a comedian’s letters to the love of her life
On Wednesday 28th November my husband, who was also my manager passed away. He was being treated for cancer at The Royal Marsden. He was the true love of my life. I wanted to start a blog to put down my own raw feelings of grief and the experiences I have had that may help others going through their own personal journey.
I hope one day to publish them as a little book for people to read and to get some comfort from.
My darling sweet bo I've ordered an engraved memorial bench to go in St Luke's Gardens where we used to sit sometimes between hospital appointments. I have a video taken in May I think of us sitting on a bench, you're wearing your lovely navy blue polo shirt with a...read more
My darling bear I've had my first birthday since you went. June 1st. Same day as Marilyn Monroe. Boo boo bi fucking doo. Last year.. I remember it so well.. I got back from one of our fave gigs - Guildford Gag House. I was doing my last stint of a regular monthly MC...read more
My sweetest lamb Today I opened a kitchen drawer and found a tube of super-glue you had used only a few months ago to mend the broken bit of the plastic bin I dropped on the floor (Dolly!!). You were so brilliant at calmly mending things whereas I'd get in a fluster....read more
Darling TG I just remembered something I wanted to share with you. I thought about it trying to get to sleep last night and it made me cry but I was comforted by it. When I visited our lovely GP, Dr K, he told me that when he was a young man and his father died he had...read more
My love I have to tell you about this Addison Lee driver. I was on my way to meet Eileen our accountant and of course you never know who will be driving. That day it was a guy called Emmanuel. We got chatting about this and that: mostly traffic in London, brexit and...read more
Darling love of my life It's Easter Sunday. April 22nd. The most horrific thing has happened today. Across the other side of the world. There have been mass bombings across Sri Lanka. The victims include worshippers in packed churches in the heart of the minority...read more
My Darling boI can scarcely believe it’s Easter. It’s been 4 months and 21 days since you left this life. 🌸 It's a warm sunny day here and the sky is blue. I plucked up the courage to go into St Lukes Church and the Good Friday service had just started....read more
My Darling I’ve just watched a new TV series called Afterlife written by Ricky Gervais. We loved watching Extras and the Office over and over again. And laughing our socks off! Anyway, Afterlife is about a man coping with the death of his wife from cancer. I binge...read more
Darling TG I went to have some skin tags removed and a mole check today. Not exactly 84 Charing Cross Road is it but I want you to know I’m taking care of myself. Surreal as I stood there in my pants while she checked my back, arms and legs. I had two skin tags and...read more
23rd March 2019 Darling bo I happened to catch the end of On Her Majesty’s Secret Service – George Lazenby holds his new wife Diana Rigg just after she’s been shot dead. He tells the policeman who stops by: ‘She’s having a little rest. Plenty of time…. we’ve got all...read more
My darling Where to start. I got a letter today addressed to you from the AA. At the top of the page it said: Your breakdown cover has run out, but we’d love to have you back. How did AA know? I’d love to have you back. I have broken down. God have I broken down. The...read more
Hello my love I just wanted you to know that after a few days of struggling a bit I’ve decided that rather than forcing myself to be ‘strong’ and carry on I’m going to take time out for a few months. I know we always said the show must go on but I feel so hollow and...read more